


Killer Bunnies

by LunaIrenePond



Series: Stories From A Radio Show In Night Vale [2]
Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: killer bunnies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-06
Updated: 2015-02-06
Packaged: 2018-03-10 16:49:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3297497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunaIrenePond/pseuds/LunaIrenePond
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What seemed like half an hour later, you never could tell in Night Vale, Cecil showed up at the lab. "Hey Cecil, we need input on how to kill nineteen killer bunnies, we were thinking explosives but we don't want to damage the Wall-mart," Carlos told Cecil as he walked in the door.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Killer Bunnies

Carlos was used to a fair amount of things in Night Vale, he had been living there for two years already, but now and again things did seem to surprise him. Like killer bunnies that were guarding one of the many caves on the outskirts of town. Carlos would had left them alone to but the thing was that the cave they were guarding just so happened to be the entrance to the Night Vale Wall-mart, the only grocery store in town. "Cecil, could you please put in a word to your listeners about the killer bunnies in front of the Wall-mart cave entrance?" Carlos asked over the phone. He had called Cecil during the middle of the weather sequence.

"Yeah Carlos, sure thing," Cecil sounded tired over the phone.

Carlos made a metal note to ask him about how much sleep he was actually getting, but that would have to wait, "Thank you, Cecil."

"Hey, Carlos," Cecil said before he could hang up. "You're not going to go try and get rid of them are you?"

Carlos could hear the worry in Cecil's voice, "I have to, Cecil, or no one will be able to get food."

"Could you just wait until I can come and help you?" Cecil asked. Ever since the incident with the floating knives outside of the apartment complex Cecil had gotten a little more wary of Carlos going off to try and deal with dangerous things by himself.

"Sure thing," Carlos said right before he hung up the phone.

"And the verdict is?" asked one of the few remaining scientist from the original group of about twenty, there were now five.

"We are going to sit and wait till Cecil's show is over so that he can come and help us," Carlos said as he ran a hand threw his hair.

"Well at least that'll give us more time to run test on this bunny we caught the other day," she said as she walked towards a large cage on the other side of the lab.

"How did you catch it?" Carlos asked slightly worried.

"Oh, we had to pry him off of Michael's leg," she shrugged. Out of the five of them Angie was the most adjusted to Night Vale. "Don't worry he will recover, the cut wasn't too deep."

"Glad to hear it…" Carlos said as he slowly walked over to the cage. The bunny inside was your normal bunny, he was white and looked completely innocent aside from the blood and viscera dripping from its chin. "Angie, have you ever seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail?"

"I know what you are thinking and yes, they seem to be the same type of bunnies," her eyes seemed to light up the more she thought about it.

"So we should be able to kill them the same way," Carlos said thinking out loud.

"And because we have already captured one to study it's not like we need any more for science…" Angie said as she realized what was going through Carlos's head.

"And they are killing people so really they count as a health problem to this town…"

"So blowing them up isn't really a moral problem…"

"Or a scientific problem," Carlos concluded.

"But there are about twenty of them," Angie said concerned about how much explosives they were going to go through.

"So, we will consult Cecil when he gets here," Carlos said. It always seemed to help to have a locals input on the matter at hand.

What seemed like half an hour later, you never could tell in Night Vale, Cecil showed up at the lab. "Hey Cecil, we need input on how to kill nineteen killer bunnies, we were thinking explosives but we don't want to damage the Wall-mart," Carlos told Cecil as he walked in the door.

"Well, the employees of the Wall-mart have barricaded themselves inside so I don't think that any explosion would hurt them any. But what kind of bunnies are they? I might have dealt with them before."

"We have one over here," Angie said as she showed Cecil over to the cage… which now had one full grown bunny and three babies. "But… but we only had one bunny a few minutes ago…" Angie said in disbelief.

"Oh I remember these guys," Cecil said with a big smile on his face. "They are self replicating killer bunnies the only way to kill them a biblical hand grenade…"

"Well do you have a biblical hand grenade?" Carlos asked with a sigh.

"Yeah I think there is one still in my hall closet, we can grab it on the way to the cave that they are guarding," Cecil grabbed his coat and started heading for the door.

"But won't we need more than one?" asked Angie as they followed Cecil down the street.

"No, once you kill one of them they all die. They have a special link. We killed one thousand of them back during my senior year of high school with only one hand grenade," they were at Cecil's apartment now and after a bit of rummaging through forgotten boxes they found the hand grenade just where Cecil said it would be. Then after a fair amount of throwing things and running away all of the killer bunnies were dead in Night Vale… well… for the time being that was.


End file.
